love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
