She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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