I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize