I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Dignity is for republicans.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
