Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You are the jesus of drinking
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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