did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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