well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
It's just like the Real World with babies
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
