from now on my penis is your penis
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize