I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize