Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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