Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
