I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
