on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize