Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize