Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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