Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
