Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
