I hate all girls vehemently.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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