i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
