Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
