it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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