Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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