Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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