I'm really into asian looking animals
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
