When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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