just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
