Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
