So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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