Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
