I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
