Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
3pm strippers are depressing
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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