I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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