i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
