so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
