I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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