No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
