idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
