hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You need Xanax blowdarts
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
