It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
