I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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