my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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