I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize