It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
