You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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