miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
