The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
