let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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