Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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