in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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