so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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