i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
